Regan
Uber Kinky
   
Reged: May 16 2007
Posts: 994
Loc: NYC
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We all have our own interests and styles, as well as enjoying play for different reasons; one way is not necessarily preferable to another in the grand scheme of things.
I take pleasure in sessioning from the exchange of energy, setting and overcoming challenges in a scene with someone I like, and building relationships over time. My goal is a having a real connection during play, in addition to, but not only, participating in a particular physical activity; it is about the experience, not the outcome. Perhaps that is a small niche, but it is where I am happy.
On a few occasions, new play partners have been flummoxed when I have not demanded or requested a self-pleasuring activity be performed upon him or herself at the end of the scene. --Sometimes I do, if it seems appropriate for the scene, but often I prefer it before arrival, request it happen at a later time and a report be sent back, or it may never even come up at all (pun intended).-- These persons are more outcome focused (another pun) and have The Special Ending as the entire goal of play.
I am curious as to how each of you perceive play. Is that Particular Finish a make-or-break for you regarding a session? Do you have other goals or necessary outcomes for a scene?
-Regan
-------------------- www.MsReganBlack.com
My Blog
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fermat
Hot New Meat
Reged: Aug 27 2007
Posts: 19
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Although I think it's safe to say that this has changed for me over time, the presence or absence of any single activity is irrelevant to my appreciation of play. The only single element that I would describe as 'make-or-break' is a mutually beneficial growth in the connection between my partner and I. If I believed a session weakened that link, I'd be disappointed.
Evolution is a funny thing.
fermat
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VMSmith
Kinky Enthusiast
Reged: May 17 2007
Posts: 221
Loc: Ocean State
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When I went to my first session I really didn't know what to expect. I'd seen the videos, read the stories and reviews but also realized that my experience would be no one elses video or review; it would be unique to me. I wasn't disappointed. My first session was a whirlwind of various activities (a "sampler" if you will) including flogging, caning, hot wax, electricity, smothering, ball weights, etc. At the end of that session the Lady told me, "Now you can give yourself a dirty cum bath!". I had been dreading that moment as I wasn't sure how my response was going to be accepted. I was in a relationship with a, mostly vanilla, Girlfriend who knew of my desires but had some jealousy of the Mistress thinking that it was going to be an intimate sexual experience. I told Her that it was not about that and my orgasms were reserved for Her. I was pleasantly surprised when the Mistress seemed ok with my wishes. Now, several years later I know that same Girlfriend would be ok if I did cum during session as it doesn't take anything away from Her. In fact She has expressed a desire to come to a session to get a better idea of what it does for me. To answer Your question (after all that bloviating) the session is all about having fun with no particular activity needed for a succesful finish. The sessions I've had so far have left me happy and wanting more. Over the past two years I've made some major changes in how I view life and one of the things that has added immensely to my happiness is releasing attachment to any outcome in any situation in which I find myself.
-------------------- "Thou art to me a delicious torment"--Emerson
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soiledsammy
Cool New Kid
Reged: Jun 20 2008
Posts: 29
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I like to cum. It gets me hot to have my Mistress watch. I go to a session to get what I want so yes I want to masturbate.
Mr. Happy DOES need to dance!
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lowfi_loser
Big Pervert
Reged: Jun 27 2007
Posts: 431
Loc: Not quite spitting distance of...
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Hi Regan -
Interesting question.
I used to think that shining the purple helmet was a necessity to a session. Back then though, I was in a much different headspace.
My views on that changed, in part due to having a better understanding of myself and what I really wanted out of session. Which is definitely the energy/power exchange.
Another part that became very apparent - was who I was playing with, rather than what I was doing mattered a lot more when I realized what that exchange entailed in its best circumstances.
I do strive for a particular outcome now however. I enjoy seeing a genuine smile at the end of playtime, and strive to make that happen.
-------------------- Why yes, she is all that and a side of fried pickle chips!
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